By | August 22, 2011


Pot Boy North was visiting an old chum in Leeds last month and was supping his favourite Timmy Taylors in deference to that reet head banging stuff Jaipur IPA from Thornbridge, a glorious drop but at 5.9 ABV, hold them horses. Well anyroad, my chum and I  were having a contemplative sup over a quiet lunchtime, and these days weekday lunchtimes are very quiet, when unannounced in toddles his BRM with a stranger in tow. The BRM goes straight to mi chum, brushes past yours truly and ignores me, butts into our chat and announces ” my associate here from Brulines,” gesturing to ‘tother bloke,” is here to inspect the bars and the cellar NOW”.

“Hold up a chuffing minute” says my chum “you can’t just barge in here like that wi sod all notice…access refused, but you can come in any time you want if you give me a bit of prior”. With that the Brulines chappie pushes the BRM out of his way “I can go anywhere I like at any time and you nor anyone else can’t stop me” and with that made to go behind the bar. Big mistake ! Mi chum was in years gone by a Door Security Executive (club bouncer) and still carries too much beef but he’s nimble on his feet for such a big bloke. He quick a lightening put his arm across the bar flap stopping the Brulines rep in his tracks.

“You’re hiding something I can tell” says Brulines ” I can smell a hefty fine coming out of this just you see, maybe even the huge costs of a lease forfeit”. Now my chum had been careful not to grab Brulines by the throat, which was what he felt like doing. Oh no, he had carefully barred his way and not laid a finger on Brulines bod.” The only thing that might smell around here is your adrenalin matey, which is brown and runny and I suggest bike clips to preserve your dignity. Now sit down , don’t move an inch and I’ll fetch mi lease right now”. I was told to keep an eye on the pair as he went and got the lease. They sat down.

“Right you pair of chuffing simpletons, which bit of this don’t you quite comprehend !”.He turns to the Lease and quotes “Under Rights Reserved, that’s what you can do to me, it blethers on about putting right breaches in the Tenants obligations, installing and maintaining flow monitoring stuff and then at the very end says, such entry…and(except where the need arises due to an emergency or the Tenant’s default)” and at this point mi Chum raised his voice and spoke very slowly-the few people in the bar went dead quiet…”to be at reasonable times on reasonable notice. Now what bit of that last sentence did either of you dimwits not understand”. Silence.

Then mi chum leafed on through the lease, “Ah here it is in black and chuffing white, it says…If the Tenant is in breach of obligations…he will on demand let the Company and others authorized by the Company enter the property to remedy that breach”. More silence. “Now miladdoes, I am not in breach of anything and you t’prat from Brulines know that reet full well, that is unless you can prove otherwise”. More embarassed silence. I took mi chum to one side while the now pink round gills BRM fiddled wi his comforter, sorry laptop. Brulines was a picture of pure bile, not a nice sight. I reminded mi chum about his Brulines access code and his absolute right to have access to his stored Brulines data for what it was worth seeing as how its basically inaccurate, but that another long story linked to Trading Standards (Ed..see many Pot Boy reports passim).

“Eh up, I want mi Brulines access code like right now” says mi chum. Brulies looks away and BRM says “I can’t give it out just like that, I have to have authorization, there are procedures”. Standoff. Nobody says anything. Brulines mutters darkly, “I’ll be back and go through every last ******* inch of your cellar, it definitely won’t be pleasant”. “Well you might think of starting with calibration” says mi chum just as darkly,” as it hasn’t been looked at since it was installed over six years ago. Aren’t your troops supposed to recalibrate every six months”. BRM and Brulines left without even a by you leave. The few regulars in the bar started clapping “That showed them idiots” and “well done Nobby, stick it up ’em” echoed round the place.

Outcome, well the Brulines access code was provided the next day, and Brulines bully, not another word, and that’s been more than seven weeks.

Goes to show how practiced bully boy tactics can work if you don’t get a bit savvy as to the rights you have hidden in the lease.

Back to the cellar !

Pot Boy North

Note from the Editor

Rent Reviews,

If you have a rent review due within the next year, please email us at, two of our colleagues who were instrumental in the discussions with the RICS to rectify the anomalies in the RICS  Valuation Guidelines are joining together to form a new business, be assured neither have worked for any of the offending Pub Co’s using the now discredited Pub Co model.

Rental settlements are now being aligned to realistic and existing business levels, which they always used to be, it is worth an email to discuss your situation with them.


The views expressed are not necessarily the editors and accepts no responsibility for them, we do try to avoid offensive or litigious statements being made. They are written by concerned professionals in the industry who feel that these issues should be raised to ensure that all licensees made fully aware of many hidden pitfalls.








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